Art my Heart

Hello 

I thought I would talk about art this week to try and lighten the load.

Finding a creative outlet that allows me to engage with my mental health has really helped me to grow over the last few years. For me that creative outlet is watercolour painting. And maybe it's something about the unpredictable nature of water that holds a certain magic. Or maybe it has something to do with water being the element of emotion? Possibly it’s my inclination towards deep inward thinking? There are many lessons in watercolour for me. 

I have tried many different types of art from felt making to oil painting but none of these creative outlets helped me to engage with my emotions in the same way that watercolour painting has. It has opened my heart to feeling and given me a safe space to explore my deepest self. 

It's taught me acceptance and that perfectionism is the enemy of creativity. Many little life lessons that flow over into the wider aspects of life in general. 

Art gave me focus during my treatments and an activity that didn't involve a screen. Watercolour is slow and deliberate, it's gentle and nurtured my mental health at a time when everything else felt like chaos. 

During chemo I re-read Viktor Frankl’s “Mans search for Meaning”(English version, 1959) which encouraged me to find a meaning to living, a reason to exist. I don't think it needs to be complicated. I think it just needs to be something heartfelt. If we can find meaning in the life we have, no matter how simple that life might be, I think it can bring us a sense of comfort and commitment to what we do. It can help re-engage us with our life in a meaningful way. This has helped me to deal with my depression and at times my grief. 

Over the last few years, I have really tried to work on being present in this moment and to live through it fully. To feel it all and not run from the feelings that scare me. Art has helped me to be present in my body and find moments of calm. This in turn allows me to deal with the more stressful times in life when things are uncertain or downright terrifying.

I think we all have a creative spark inside us, whether it's decoupage or knitting boobs for charity, baking cakes or welding giant vulva’s, poetry about periods and songwriting epic ballads of endo-warriors. Or maybe even something a little more sane if it pleases. Art doesn't have to be painting and it certainly doesn't have to be perfect. So let's slay perfectionism and let our artists' hearts roam freely. What kind of world could we create?

With

love 

M x